Embrace the "suck"
You can embrace the suck by realizing you are in an FFT (F%$@$ First Time/ Terrible First Time). To break this down, you need to practice the strategy to accomplish the FFT.
Name the FFT
Why am I confused, ashamed, out of control? We need the meaning behind why we’re in an FFT. If we are in the middle of something hard, naming it doesn’t give it power, it gives US power. When we name the FFT and own the hard thing, it doesn’t give the hard thing power, it only gives us power. The best definition of power comes from Martin Luther King, Jr., when he said, “Power is the ability to affect change and achieve purpose.” So, when we name the FFT, it gives us the power to affect change and achieve purpose. You finally realize, “Oh wow, this is hard because I’m in an FFT”!
Examples of FFT may include: a new job, a new relationship, cutting your bangs for the first time. FFTs do not have to be life altering. They can be baking a cake for the first time.
2. Naming the FFT leads us to three steps:
We can normalize it.
“Oh, this is how new is supposed to feel” and “Whoa, being brave is uncomfortable”
We can put it in perspective.
This feeling is not permanent and it doesn’t mean I suck at everything.
I can reality-check my expectations.
This is going to suck for a while. I am not going to crush this right away.
We have terrible expectations over first times, and feel so much shame for it.
Remember, expectations are resentments waiting to happen. If you don’t own the feelings and feel them, they will eat you alive.
